Father Demands Daughter Split The Inheritance Equally Despite His Mother Giving Everything To One Granddaughter. Says, “She Intentionally Set It Up For The Daughter To Fail In It”. Is This Reasonable?

No matter how logical you think you’re being, questioning a dead person’s will and wanting to make changes as you please is not at all justified.

An internet user asked, “Am I a jerk for expecting my daughters to share their grandma’s inheritance 50/50 regardless of the will?”. We need to hear your take on the matter.

Backstory

The Original Poster, OP has two daughters who were his late mother-in-law’s only grandchildren, Elise (22f) and Rea (21f).

She always favored Elise because Elise wanted to follow in her footsteps and be just like her. She spent so much more time with Elise, teaching her everything about her profession and using her connections to get her set up in her field.

What Does OP Say

“When she went into care, she had to disperse her assets to pay for it. She took yet another opportunity to favor Elise by making sure she alone got her tools and a small amount of land that she used to set up greenhouses.”, says OP.

What Happened Around A Year Ago?

OP’s MIL passed away a little over a year ago, and they got a letter in the mail about a trust that she had set up about a decade ago. There isn’t much, about $30,000. The trust states that it’s supposed to be shared equally between her grandchildren and can only be fully dispersed when the youngest is 21.

“The only two grandchildren are my daughters, Elise and Rea, and Rea just turned 21.”, says OP.

The Supposedly Problematic Clause

They asked about it and got the answer that, unfortunately, only Elise is eligible to withdraw any money from this trust. Their grandmother set up a clause that anyone who had a child before the minimum age to inherit was automatically disqualified.

“In short, if one of the grandchildren has a baby before age 21, they get $0 and their portion goes to the other heirs.”, says OP.

Here’s The Tricky Part

Rea has a two-year-old son, and Elise doesn’t have kids, so according to the terms, Elise gets 100%. OP is annoyed. His wife wants to just let it go and ignore that it ever existed just like the land. OP doesn’t.

Why Is OP Annoyed?

“My mother-in-law never treated Rea like a real grandchild. She never spent real time with her or gave her the same opportunities. At the time she set this up, Elise had to undergo a hysterectomy. She set this up so that only Rea could ‘fail’ and she’d have an excuse to get a dig in one last time.”, says OP.

The Final Fuss

OP swallowed the land thing because it affected Elise’s career and there were already things to maintain that only Elise cared about, but this was too much.

“I think Elise is obligated to do the right thing and split this with her sister. Elise thinks we shouldn’t fight the will and my wife is trying to ‘stay neutral’.”, says OP.

Now OP wants to know if he is a jerk.

You’re Certainly The Jerk

“You’re the jerk, you have no right to question what other people do with their money and keep your nose out of other people’s business.

That’s Not How Trusts And Wills Work

“You’re the jerk. I get that you’re unhappy, but this is not your choice to make nor your choice to impose. That’s not how trusts and wills work. Talk to an attorney, but in all likelihood, the only way for this to be lawfully distributed is in accordance with the conditions of the trust.”

You Have Absolutely No Say Over Here

“You have absolutely no say in this inheritance. It wasn’t your money and you have no right to say how it is divided up.

You also tried to sway opinion by leaving out that the girls are not biologically related and thus explains why there wasn’t much of a relationship between your daughter and your MIL.”

You Left Out Crucial Information!

“So Rea wasn’t the biological granddaughter? Why don’t you add this to your post, it makes a lot of difference. Just because your wife adopted your daughter doesn’t mean her mother had to. Anyway, no, Elise has left the money so she gets to keep it. You’re the jerk.”

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