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Wife Turns Hostile As Husband Refuses To Come Home Citing Hostility. Says, “You Come Home Now, Fix Baby A Meal”. Is She Overreacting or Is He A Jerk?

The husband and wife relationship is one of the most complicated ones. You have to respect the other while also living your life in the way you like.

A netizen recently asked, “Am I a jerk for getting mad and demanding my husband come home?”. Read on to know what exactly panned out.

Backstory

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Yesterday, Original Poster (OP) went to a big, out-of-town event with her 8-month-old baby.

OP’s husband stayed home and to her knowledge, was just going to do some house stuff and go to a family lunch.

OP told him they’d be home by dinner time (which for them is around 5:30 – 6 pm), and that once she got home it would probably be a whirlwind of dinner > bath > bed for the baby. OP makes dinner during the week and her husband makes dinner on weekends.

What Happened When OP Got Home?

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OP got home at 5:10, and he wasn’t home. The baby had been screaming for the last 30 minutes of the drive, she was tired and pretty high-strung.

When OP called her husband, she had to scream “Where are you?” to be heard over the screaming baby. It would have come across as aggressive, but she wasn’t mad at this point.

What Did OP’s Husband Say?

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OP’s husband said he was out drinking with a friend. She asked him why he was at a bar on a Sunday evening. He said he thought she wouldn’t be home until after dinner. He’d apparently misheard OP. This is when she got mad.

OP Snapped At Him

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OP snapped at him, asking why he’d think she’d keep the baby out until after dinner on a Sunday. OP told him to come home asap. He said he didn’t intend to come home for another 2 hours and that she should have messaged when she was leaving the event.

OP said she didn’t message because she had her hands full and she expected him to get the first bus home. He eventually agreed to be home by 6:30.

Did He Come Home By 6:30?

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6:30 passes, and he’s not home. OP calls again, and he says he’s still at the bar. OP lost her absolute mind, saying that she was waiting for him to come home to help fix the baby something to eat, but now the baby will have to go to bed without a proper meal or bath.

He said she was acting psychotic, to give the baby pouch food, and that the baby didn’t need a bath. He said he didn’t want to come home because OP was acting hostile, and he didn’t want to be around her.

OP told him to forget about her and that he needed to come home because he had an obligation to help take care of his son.

What Happened Next?

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OP’s husband comes home at 8 p.m. after the baby is asleep. OP asked him this morning why he thought it was cool to refuse to come home and leave her to tend to the baby alone after being with the baby alone all day.

He Said He Didn’t Know

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He said he didn’t know they’d be home that early. OP said sorry for not messaging that we were leaving the event and asked why he didn’t come home once he found out he’d misunderstood. He said OP being rude on the phone made him not want to come home.

“I think I’m a jerk for being stressed out but I think he’s a jerk too for using that as an excuse to not fulfill his parental duties. So am I a jerk for getting mad?”, asks OP.

Anyone Would Be Anxious

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“If I had been around my baby all day and came home to no husband (contrary to what his plans were) I would be frustrated. Just reading her post gave me anxiety.

I would be yelling too and the fact he wouldn’t come home would make me madder. When is drinking at a bar more important than helping with your child? I don’t care how she talked to him….respect works both ways.”

He Shouldn’t Have Done That

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“Not the jerk. Once he knew you were distressed at home and needed his help, he should have come to help and then addressed your attitude, not avoid you and baby and stay out longer, like how was that gonna help the situation.”

His Audacity Seems Disgusting

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“Not the jerk. He was home alone all day and didn’t even prepare dinner or get things ready for you? You had the baby solo and he decided to go out and not tell you. I might be harsh but when he found out you were home early and you were stressed he should have IMMEDIATELY come home and help.

You haven’t had a break yet. Solo parenting is exhausting (I’m a solo mum). I am frankly disgusted at his audacity to stay out until 8 pm. So it’s been over 3 hours since you were home that he ignored you.

You mentioned that this discussion on communicating happens often and he gets time with his friends often and you also do the majority of the baby care. Does he give you a break? Yeah, you shouldn’t have yelled but it sounds like it’s been bubbling for a while. He needs a reality check.”

Communicate Better Next Time

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“Not the jerk – I’ve seen enough of my friends go through this with their own husbands, though I think communication could be better, you’re probably exhausted and just hoped he would be home to take the baby’s hand off, just communicate better next time.”

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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.