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12 Things Men Are Ashamed Of Doing But Do It When No One Is Looking

When the house is empty and a man finds himself alone, does he revel in the solitude or simply continue his daily routine? The question lingered unanswered until someone dared to pose it in the vast realm of the internet

A netizen recently asked, Men in relationships, what’s the first thing you do when you get the house to yourself? And these hilarious responses had us cracking up like anything.

Nothing 

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Image Credit: Damir Khabirov, Shutterstock

“Literally nothing. I do nothing.” Said one. 

“I lay on the couch with the sun hitting me, plus there’s a nice breeze to enjoy. Always gets me.” Another added. 

Enjoy The Silence 

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“Turn off as many noise sources as possible and enjoy the silence. We have kids so it’s always noisy.” Said one. 

“The silence usually leads to a nap I forgot I needed.” Another added. 

Shower Beers & So Much More 

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“Bring the motorcycle inside, do burnouts in the kitchen, chase the Roomba around, overcook microwave meals, undercook steaks, and enjoy a shower beer/cider.” Said one. 

“Shower beers. My brother stayed with us for a few weeks and asked why beer was in the bathroom trash. He’ll understand one day.” Another added.

Let My Body Breathe 

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Take off my pants, take off my shirt. Enjoy living in boxers and letting my baaahdie breathe.” Said one.

“It’s a human right to do this even when the family is home.” Another added.

Music, Ps5, And Spend Time With The Bros

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“Listen to music, play Ps5 on the big TV, cook some food she’s not really into, drinks some beers, and maybe have some mates over. When she comes back, the house is clean.” 

Get Chores Done & Watch TV

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“I’d look around if anything needs to be done (like chores), do them, and when the work’s done, I’ll just watch TV or play some games.”

Loud Music, Joints, And Pizza 

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“Record player with 90s hip hop blasting, fat ass joints, pizza, videogames, and sleeping in.” Said one. 

“This. But replace the pizza with a TBone steak.” Another added.

Poop With Bathroom Door Open

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“Poop with the bathroom door open.” Said one. 

“Nice. I still can’t because our family likes to show up unannounced and let themselves in. Plus, we have cats, and I don’t like someone sitting in my lap when I’m trying to poop.” Another added. 

Read Books 

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Flop down on the couch and read for like 8 hours straight.” Said one.

“holy Dogears, that sounds glorious.” Another exclaimed.

Sleep, Relax, And Watch YouTube Videos Out Loud 

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“Sleep. 

When she’s gone for a weekend, I get home from work at 1 pm on a Friday, and I sleep for about 5  hours. Then I get up, go to the store, buy good quality food, eat a great meal, relax, and watch movies I want. Then I go to sleep at a reasonable time and watch YouTube videos out loud in bed. 

For some reason on Saturday and Sunday, I am full of energy, I get loads done around the house, and I see friends and do fun things without being stressed. 

Then she comes home and asks why I’m never like that when she’s home. I was a clean freak before I met her.”

Time To Get ‘Those’ Cuties In The Bed

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“DOGS IN THE BED.” Said one. 

“Cried laughing at this. Wholesome and real AF.” Another replied.

Plan An Outdoor Project 

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“When I know she is leaving for a few days I always plan an outdoor project or a woodworking project that I can surprise her with when she gets home.”

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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.