Have you ever had someone make fun of your name? It can be a hurtful experience, especially if it happens repeatedly. If your sister-in-law is constantly using your name as an example of a terrible name, you may be wondering if you’re wrong for asking her to stop.
A user asked, “Am I wrong for telling my sister-in-law to stop using my name as her example of a terrible name every single time?”. Read the complete story to know who is wrong here.
Backstory
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The Original Poster’s (OP) name is Wren (26f), and she is married to Jax (26m). They have been together since we were 19. OP has known his family almost the whole length of that, and generally, they are close. The exception is his sister Katherine.
She has this thing against OP’s name, and whenever she wants to give an example of a terrible name, she uses my name Wren as the example. The first time it happened, OP’s husband and OP were still only dating, it was a few months into our relationship, and Katherine was expecting her first baby.
She Blurted it Out
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Over dinner, she blurted out while OP and her husband were debating names that she was open to a lot as long as the name was not dumb like Wren’s. OP’s husband and his parents called her out. She dismissed them.
What Did She Do Then?
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Then after her oldest child arrived, he had no name because she and her husband could not agree. They argued over it, and she said she didn’t want her child to have a stupid non-name like Wren.
OP’s Husband Asked Her To Use A Different Name
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OP’s husband (still boyfriend then) told her she could find a different name to use, but he would not let her keep disrespecting OP’s name like that. She told him that OP would surely agree with her, and OP chimed in and said, “Actually, I always loved my name.”
She was speechless and said fine, but she wanted a standard name, not something “cooler,” “edgier,” or “different,” and OP’s husband was like, that’s not for us to decide, but Wren doesn’t need to come into it.
Read: 21 Things You’re Saying That Make People Dislike You “Instantly”: Guilty of Any?
What Happened Next?
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She did get better at it, but she still does it occasionally, and OP has noticed only when my husband is not around.
OP knows she doesn’t like their child’s name, which is fine; she doesn’t ever say anything. But Wren is still invariably used as her example of a terrible name or a name that should never be used. She doesn’t talk about it as much.
What Happened Next
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Then they were all at OP’s husband’s parent’s house last Saturday. OP was with her child, and Katherine was trying to settle her two younger kids.
Another family member came in, someone OP don’t know so well, and they were talking, and the family member was asking for advice on naming the baby she was expecting. Katherine yet again used Wren as an example of a terrible name.
Only this time, she went a little harder on her hate for the name, and she said it was ridiculous, a non-name, and parents should have their kids taken away for ruining their kids.
What Did OP Do?
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OP stepped in and told her she hates my name, OP got it, but she needs to stop using my name as her example for bad names every time.
OP said, “I still love my name and do not want to hear you diss it, and I did not want to hear you diss my parents by saying something like she just had. The cousin was shocked that Katherine did that and left.”
Katherine Said Noone Can Police Her Thoughts
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Katherine told OP she could not police her thoughts or words, and OP was incredibly entitled to tell her what she could and could not say. OP’s husband heard her yelling and came in and said we should leave. He told Katherine she had gone too far. She still says OP was the one who way overstepped.
OP wants to know if she is a jerk.
What do you think? Here is what others have to say:
Read: 18 Things You Never Realized the Pandemic Has Completely Ruined
She Is a BULLY
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“Not a jerk. She’s a horrible bully. Why the insistence on insulting you on every occasion? It sounds like bullying, and there is no excuse. However much she might hate your name, why would she tell you repeatedly? It’s unnecessary, and so mean. Imagine how she’d react if you kept laughing at her name and calling it too traditional and stuffy.
By the way, Wren is such a pretty name. Much nicer than Katherine. ”
She Has a Problem With You
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“Not wrong. She sounds extremely annoying. I wonder why she feels the need to provoke you like that? If it is really “just the name” or if she has a problem with you.”
She Is Disrespecting You
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“Wren is a lovely name! Your SIL has issues, and rudeness is just one of them. Start referring to her as Common Kathy and see how she likes it.
She is disrespecting you and your name; she is a jerk.”
Crossed A Line
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“Not wrong. Katherine disrespected you numerous times, and she took it too far when she said parents should lose their rights for choosing that name.
It could have started as her being jealous and dissing your name to make herself feel better about herself to her being bitter and angry that your husband and in-laws defended you.
If it were me, I would tell my husband that I would not be around Katherine unless she apologizes and doesn’t disrespect me again.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs. Daaku Studio.