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14 Things You Need Unlearn That Your Parents Taught you

As kids, we absorb parental teachings. Not all remain relevant with life's complexities. Thus, we unlearn some beliefs for a fulfilling life. The forum asked, "What parental teachings did you unlearn?" See the top responses.

PEOPLE PLEASING

“People pleasing. I struggle with this BAD.”

BEING LOYAL TO THE COMPANY

“Be loyal to the company, and you will be rewarded. People who are job hoppers tend to get paid more than those who stay.”

SPANKING

“Spanking is the only way to get kids to learn. All it taught me was how to lie and listen for footsteps.”

BURDEN FOR EVERYONE

“That I’m a burden for everyone. They didn’t do it on purpose, but I still feel like I bother everyone with my presence, even as a young adult.”

EATING HABITS

“You don’t have to eat everything on the plate. Thanks for making me obese.”

ESCALATING DISAGREEMENTS

"My mom escalates disagreements into fights, treating differences as personal attacks. It made me combative too. It was hard to discern when she was escalating or addressing the real issue. She’s a hoarder, treating expired relish as a family heirloom and holding grudges over minor deeds."

NOT TRYING ANYTHING NEW

"Don't try- too hard, you'll quit. Realized in adulthood my dad found my extracurriculars a nuisance, he was just lazy. Took YEARS to complete value tasks."

NOT ADDRESSING A BAD BEHAVIOR

“Sweeping everything under the rug and not addressing bad behavior head-on. Setting boundaries.”

BLOOD RELATIONSHIPS

“That blood relations are important.”

SCHOOL

“People who do well in school are better than anybody else.”

CORPORAL PUNISHMENT OF CHILDREN

"I experienced strict discipline in childhood, unlike my in-laws who were more free-spirited, raising socially rounded but sensitive children. This resulted in a dichotomy between a less self-centered, more chaotic mindset and a more fragile one. Interestingly, we ended up marrying people from opposing family structures. Maybe it's all subjective without any causation."

NOT ALLOWED TO SHOW EMOTIONS

"I couldn't express emotions as a child. I wasn't the silent type, but without support, I felt a burden. I still struggle with this mindset today."

WORRYING ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK

“Worrying about what people think. I don’t think I’ll ever get past this. They were all about “what will the neighbors think”…and everyone else in the universe.”

THERAPY

“Going to therapy doesn’t mean you are weak.”

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