The last thing you want to be advised in regard to your soon-to-be wedding is getting a “DNA test” to confirm whether or not you are related to your future husband. Sad as it may be, some people seem to have weird thought processes.
A netizen recently asked, “Am I a jerk for suggesting my sister and fiancé get a DNA test before they get married?”. We need to hear your thoughts.
The Original Poster’s (OP’s) sister (26F) is engaged to her fiancé (30M) and getting married later this year. They both have the same last name. She was excited by this idea because then she won’t have to change her last name when they get married.
OP has been a little bit concerned because OP’s family comes from a small rural county in their state, and his sister’s fiancé’s family comes from the next county over. OP’s state also has a history of polygamy… and large families.
What Happened Recently?
At their most recent family get-together, OP suggested (not for the first time) that they get a DNA test to make sure they aren’t related. At first, no one said anything, and everyone just sat in awkward silence.
Then OP’s dad chimed in and said, “We can just wait until the babies come out and see if they are cross-eyed”. OP laughed at his joke, and OP’s sister said that their last name is one of the most common last names in the state.
What Does OP Say?
OP says, “It’s not, but it is a common last name. I said that they still should check to be sure. At this point, she told me to shut up and the conversation was over because nobody wants to deal with her.
The wedding is in less than three months. Am I wrong for suggesting they get a DNA test? Or do you agree that it should be a concern?”
You’re The Jerk, Definitely
“You’re the jerk. You’re nagging her about something that’s none of your business and you’re not backing off when asked to do so. They can’t be *that* closely related, if they’re related at all, or older family members would have spotted the crossover.
It’s a common surname, and honestly, sharing great-great-great grandpa generations ago isn’t a concern. Stop pestering your poor sister and obsessing over her potential child’s genetics.”
They Didn’t Wanna Deal With Her Or You?
“OP, are you sure the conversation was over because nobody wanted to deal with her, as opposed to nobody wanting to deal with you? Of all the things you need to let go because they’re not your concern, this is in the top 5. You’re the jerk.
Anyone Would Be Offended
“You even say this wasn’t the first time you’ve mentioned it – how often are you telling them to get a DNA test? I’d be offended, too. Butt out.
Your dad’s joke wasn’t funny either.”
Are You Even Aware of How Common That Is?
“*Laughs in entire Asian continent*.
Do you know how common cousin marriages and marriages within your community/village still are in significant chunks of the world?
As long as they aren’t actually siblings, there’s nothing wrong going on here. Your concern is valid, but bringing it up more than once, and in front of everyone, was a jerk move.”
You Shouldn’t Have Been So Direct
“You should probably stop asking at this point. It does sound like too much and honestly, you’re being too direct. You should’ve suggested they both do that really fun ancestry test cause it does the same thing but less obvious.”
It’s Not Even An Issue, Probably
“You haven’t looked into the actual facts of what you’re talking about. If they don’t even know if they’re related then there’s no way they’re closely related enough for it to be an issue.”
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This article was originally published on Mrs Daaku Studio.